Ancient History Nerds Mugs

Noah's life jacket demonstration

"This ought to keep the kids busy for a while."

Tourists

"Aristophanes explains comedy"

"If we only used bigger clubs we would defeat our enemies every time, and we would dominate them forever!"

"Frankly, I can't wait until I evolve into a bird..."

"Have you been playing dice?"

"I've come across a rather disturbing find, Carstairs!"

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

Sphinx cat and mummy mouse

'It's an extinction notice.'

'Yorick? No, I don't think so, unless of course he was a Neanderthal!'

'The dreaded Anachronisaurus strikes again!'

"I find that hugely offensive!"

"He conquered the known world - now all he's got is sudoku."

Grim Reaper rowing a boat full of dead souls to the afterlife; a tip jar sits on the side of the boat.

'I'm sure he was a great guy, but there's a new Pharaoh in town.'

Euripides: 'If we could be twice young and twice old, we could correct all our mistakes.'

The Fall of Gnome

'I think it's more than a coincidence that I discover fire, and my wife discovers burnt food on the same day.'

6,000 BC: Neolithic Barbecue

"I couldn't care less if being Homo Sapiens is the latest trend. While you're living in our cave, you better act like a true Neanderthal."

A child at a museum starts to pull the wrappings off a mummy.

'You can come down a peg. Mesopotamia gave the world bureaucracy, you know.'

"Here's the parking lot."

"Darn autocorrect!"

Herding lava back to the fire pit.

'Who's the new guy?'

'Sometimes I wish we'd never told him he was adopted.'

"No, this is NOT a beta-test!"