Ancestry Celebration Gifts

"I'm glad you got to meet some of my heroes, Katie..."

"Ours is not a creative clan."

"My great-great-grandfather was forced to flee Europe because of religious persecution."

A man looks up at the earth

'All right, I wanna know which one of you really like me and which ones are just networking...'

"Running of the the chickens!? This is crazy! Dad, no one celebrates Hispanic Heritage Month like this!"

'One of my forebears.'

"My dad was really good at showing me how to throw poo. He was just never any good at explaining exactly why I should be throwing it."

'My husband's ancestors did come over on the Mayflower. The scraped them off the bottom of the boat.'

"Everyone here is alive because I got laid."

Ancenstry.com Your results: Oak: 80% Pine: 12% Maple: 3% Unknown: 5%

"He had it commissioned just before he died."

Two hands holding a picture of a girl.

I always felt I should have been born into royalty, Doctor Kapuchnik. If it's any consolation, Al, you're a royal pain.

'It's a coat of arms, not a logo.'

Maternity nurse presenting newborn baby with big nose to father with big nose.

'This is just a holiday tradition - It's nothing personal.'

"As if we didn't already know too much about ourselves, we're having our DNA done."

The family tradition lives on: I won the Long Jump and the Triple Jump events...

Genealogy Service. Family Trees Traced. I discovered that not only are you heir to an unclaimed family fortune, but I'm your long lost brother Wally!

Who's your daddy?, INC. It

First Marriage.

Billy listened spell-bound as his grandfather told him magical tales about the adventures of his ancestors.

Prosthetic Society Annual Hoe-Down : 'You put your left leg in, you put your left leg out..'

In today's lesson, we'll talk about our ancestors 'The Mammoths'

"One day junior, all this will be yours..."

"Someday, son, all this will be yours."

'My mother was a race horse. My father was a stablehand who got five years for sodomy.'

" ...and this is the armor of my ancestor, 'Cederick the Unintimidating.'"

"Don't look down on me, Buster, my ancestors were dinosaurs...what were yours?"

"Wow. I share DNA with Moby Dick!"

DNA Tests. Discover your ancestry. That was great! I love taking a science test where it's not possible to give a wrong answer.

"The test results indicate you're the descendant of a parade float."

"Our new employee Thomson's great-great-grandfather was Russian, his great-grandmother Greek,his great-grandfather German and his mother Spanish."

"We've built on their ancestral moonshining grounds."