Amusement Aficionado Prints

"Guess your weight gain since you've been here"

Guess your weight-related illness.

Narcissist in the tunnel of love.

How the bones got into the Le Brea Tar Pits

This Summer, Come to...Parkway Playland!

"Maybe we should reschedule. It's bark-to-bark up here and Waze says it's forty minutes to the lazy river."

A subway to Coney Island.

Vintage Bumper Cars.

'You'll never guess who I bumped into today!'

'The wife came up with the idea, the Haunted House was dead in this heat, yeah its going down a storm.'

"That's a first. I got charged an entertainment tax for people watching."

Man hitchhiking at tunnel of love.

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

"Do you want to pretend to be a doctor and I'll pretend to be a hotshot civil litigation attorney who sues you till your ears bleed?"

Zombie standup

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

'The proliferation of bird watchers make me more and more self-conscious...'

"What's a patent?"

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

'The history of Glue. It's impossible to put down.'

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

Desk trays - 'in', 'out', and 'one of these days'.

"Cat box"

'It's a deal, lets sniff bottoms!'

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

Easter Island legs

Love at First Sight

"This is nice … let’s not hop again tomorrow."

"How long will we, the descendants of wolves, be content with table scraps and belly rubs?"

"Of all the buildings I've designed, it's probably the most handsome."

The Fourth Little Pig

"When I was your age. I was really smelly."

"Vintage? What would you like it to be?"