American Dreams Gifts

"Where else can you go from the security detail to owning the whole place?"

What else is there to wish for?

Cat with Lion reflection in mirror

"Me, as soon as I'm old enough, I'm out of here! I'll go and join my older brother: he's a beach bum in San Diego, California..."

The star hunters

'After researching our dream vacation online with reviews, commentaries, we cams and pictures, we felt we'd been there and didn't need the trip!'

"Remember, education pays, unless you end up an adjunct - like me."

"I object!" "Overruled!"

'What can you wish for?!... Oh, I don't know... Infinite wealth, beautiful women throwing themselves at your feet, fame and admiration, perhaps?... But, don't let me influence you.'

"Have your parents sign this waiver concerning violations of personal space. . . then you guys can play tag."

The Idea of America.

"Where am I going to college? I thought this was college."

Vegetarian Nightmare.

'No, Adam, 'awesome' is not an acceptable choice of what you want to be when you grow up.'

DACA

"You give the tooth fairy your teeth, and she gives you some money. It's called reverse mortgage."

Breakfast surreal.

"Have a career, and then if you want to try acting, you'll have my blessing."

"Why be a princess...when I can be a queen?"

'Oh for heaven's sake, Jim... all he wants to do is perform a vasectomy on you.'

'Help me, sir... I want to save my last sip of lemonade, but it doesn't work!'

'Was it the beaver dream again?'

"I had that dream again...the one where I'm falling."

When dogs dream...

"His goal is to outlive rock and roll!"

'If I've calculated correctly, I have two more birthdays before I never have to mow the lawn again.'

"It's lonely at the top...But it beats being depressed at the bottom."

'We now have the technology to record your dreams. From now on, your dreams are our intellectual property.'

Sleeping Potion

'They call this the theatre of dreams.'

'According to this stop watch I'm not growing up fast enough.'

"I want you kids to always follow your hopes and screams."

'When I grow up, I want to destroy Tokyo!'

I've been having very strange dreams lately, but they're no match for how bizarre waking hours life has seemed.

"I had a dream about a huge flaming rock falling from the sky! What do you think it means?"