Amateur Philosopher Pillows

30% Heredity, 70% Environment

Pig philosophy class - 'I'm pink, therefore I'm ham'

'If you bark your head off all night in a forest and no one hears you, are you still a bad dog?'

"I really like your parents. They go out a lot."

Men discussing tactics of getting a drink from the bar

'What makes you think anything you have to say is worth repeating?'

'You have to wonder sometimes: What do you think he does with all our milk?'

'So? -- What could be more Zen than empty calories?'

"Who do you suppose came first - us or those things?"

'I just don't know what all you men see in her...'

Humans...What is their purpose?

"According to mom the answers are all in this book!" "Too bad there's no pictures at which to look!"

"Fred's calculating what future natural catastrophes he can ignore based on his probably life span."

"Feel free to take notes."

"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"

5pm Happy Hour. 6pm discussion: what is true happiness?

'When I grow up, I'm either going to be an authority figure or an unimpeachable source.'

"Je suis Descartes, donc, je pense."

Road sign: 'No Passing Zone... This, too, shall pass.'

'The Questioner'

(When I'm good I'm very very good, but when I'm bad I'm... Well….) (Horrid?)

"Could I ask just one question?"

"I feel I've outgrown this facility, Mrs. Thompson. Could we see what else is around?"

"Dad, please tell me again about that mass production and consumerism."

'Who's this 'Art in Heaven' guy you keep talking about?'

'Wow! -- Talk about a paradigm shift!'

For some reason, "The Road Less Travelled" GPS package never really caught on...

Pastorius wonders why.

"Ever feel like even when you're barking at something you're still barking at nothing?"

"Existentialist Trail. Get lost then found. Nietzsche Park System"

Canine obidience class: 'He wouldn't budge from the armchair.'

"Hey, I'm just playing devil's avocado!"

'The meaning of life is dog food.'

A bear is sat on an armchair with old man slippers.

Zenemies.