Alternative Health Explorer Pillows

Aromatherapy.

Natural alternative dentistry.

Alternative medicine clinic, specialising in alternative illnesses.

"If this company can make an herbal soda...there's no reason why I can't make and sell my own too!"

"While we don't believe in vaccination for our child, we're not entirely against keeping him safe and healthy."

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

Self help acupuncture

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

'I'm just not sure how much more I can teach you.'

Hot Pie Therapy

"Oh, please. Lord, no ... I'm only 50! No, please – anything but reading glasses!"

I read an article about the health benefits of dark chocolate so I make sure all the donuts I eat are covered with dark chocolate.

'Looks like Shelia has overdone it with the cream scones this week!'

"All I take anymore is mushrooms for my anxiety, ketamine for my depression, and ibuprofen for the goblins constantly eating my feet."

'Who would have thought there was a market for it? We're going to be rich George!...'

Diet Books: Fiction/Non-Fiction

Shaman reads magazine entitled 'Witch Doctor'.

Ed finally had to admit that his body was less of a temple and more of a worn-out parish church with a bouncy castle out front.

Doctor to overweight patient: 'I assure you, stomach stapling is quite routine these days.'

We at pharmacorp are 100% behind the benefits of spiritual and artistic therapies which is why we've developed 'megazymol' to enhance the experience!

'He's the star of a new medical series.'

"CBD… oil… CBD… oil…"

"Well the good news is that everything was supposed to be bad for you is actually good, but the bad news is that everything that you thought was good for you is actually bad."

"Aren't you getting a little carried away with this herbal medicine, Doctor?"

"Okay, Jaxcsunn, stay still in the crystal circle while I douse you in essential oils."

"I'd consider taking out this appendix you'renot using and greatly expanding your kidney area."

Flo figured that since she was using medical marijuana during chemo, she might as well go hippy retro.

'I can't wait for a generic version of eyes of newts to come out.'

'How is the detox going?'

"And this one is made of ancient crystals that detoxify the air and remove all the money from your pocket."

'My guru thinks you're nuts.'

Je-Hereford's Witnesses

A man's health care options.

"It's just that you might find food a lot cheaper!"