Alligator Appreciator Pillows

'We're design classics son - unchanged for hundreds of millions of years...These new gimmicky things come and go.'

Support group therapy for male black widow spiders.

"But can't I be feared and loved?"

Florida - Still Gay as F**k

"Just for the heck of it, how do you plead?"

'Excuse me - are you organic?'

OK! I promise that the questions will be easy!

A Venus cow trap.

Dear folks. Well, you were right; being the prettiest gator of the Everglades hasn't helped me one bit.'

Brown Non-Recluse Spider

"Young Billy play lak he on fire tonite!"

'Whoever wants my job must lift the sword from the stone.'

'Me? Argue? ...No, sir! That was an excellent call.'

Things we need to acknowledge

"How long can you stay out here before your toes wrinkle?"

'The squid seems a bit underdone.'

"Put the oven on dear, I've picked us up a lovely leg of salmon."

'Yeachh! This isn't easy when they're not potty trained.'

"What can you possibly expect from my client, your honor? He's a wolf!"

'Hey, I think that's him: alligator riding motorcycle, wearing goggles and a bandana - hold it - there's no bandana.'

'Careful, he bites.'

Puppy school vs. kitten school

"Can you keep a secret?"

A Cow watching a horror movie.

It's true what they say: Life at the top can be lonely...

"Well, you're not itsy-bitsy to me."

"It's not straw - it's rattan."

'We had to hire a bigger venue to accommodate the elephant in the room.'

'The sun! The beach! Herb, didn't I tell you Florida was the answer?'

Nelly Copter

alligator halloween

"Cosmetic dentistry changed my life."

"Hi! - We hear that this is a 'nation of immigrants,' right?"

"Sorry we missed the heist - we got sidetracked when Roscoe selled some truffles."