Alien Artifact Lover Pillows

"Hey hey! Found a quarter!"

"'I don't want war'. . . well, wither our translation program is broke or this president has a strange kind of humor!"

"Something very big buried a lot of bones here."

Outer Space Outsourcing

"Look what I found, dad!"

"Abduction 101, when abducting eggs from a primitive planet always lower the temperature in the ship!"

"Houston, we have a problem."

"The space aliens who abducted me wanted to know what it was like to be loved...I wasted no time."

"Would you relax? They never look up."

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

dog vs UFO...

'They're just like us, except they watch more television.'

'I suppose you'll use this as an excuse for turning in your homework in late again.'

'You caught it, you gut it!'

Save Our Universe

'Excuse me could you please direct me to the nearest toilet?'

'Look at that! Peanuts!'

'It's good to be here. We're having economic problems where we come from.'

'Oh, nothing's wrong -- I just expected Earthlings to be taller, that's all.'

Friends and enemies of the Earth.

Alien embryo growing in earth.

"Don't be sad, Bud. These decisions are so political."

How am I abducting?

"Oh boy charades! I love charades! Something big? Is it a bird? It's sharp! Behind? Above?"

Standard endings for sci-fi movies...

"If you lied about where you are from, what else have you lied about?"

"Do you think there's intellegent life in there?"

"How many darn burritos did you eat?"

"Cthulhus, sir. Thousands of 'em."

Alien uses astronaut's visor as TV to watch news.

* Let's stop here, they seem nice!

"Now that's what I'M talkin' 'bout!"