Alcohol Tasting Pillows

"What wine goes best with vodka?"

"It's going to be huge! Cheese-flavored vodka!"

'Hoots-Mon... with a wee dram at these prices I'll never get tipsy!'

"It doesn't matter if the glass is half empty or half full if you have a case."

Beer is made by men, wine by god.

"Pick me! No me! Me! Pick me! Pick ME!"

Beer Bellies.

'... and a stinger for my friend.'

'We've got it in cups, saucers, even in buckets, but not in bottles.'

'A couple shots of whiskey and the numbers don't look so bad any more.'

'Why do you keep coming in half drunk after lunch?'

'It's a taste I think I can say I've acquired.'

'What happened to your hand.'

'Whiskey and splash, sir.'

Alcohol 'Nector of the Gods' 'Devils Brew!'

Acme brewery.

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

"I'm re-balancing my portfolio to 10% bonds, 90% scotch."

'I can drink beer, wine or liquor. I'm a 'hybrid.''

Beer.

'Ah, 'man's best friend' and it's brought by a dog.'

'She swallowed the schnapps ... '

'You shouldn't drink on an empty head,'

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

"This place has the best happy hour."

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

Sloaney Pony.

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

'Well, now that I know he's the owner's son, yes, he's the best damned wine steward I've ever seen.'

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

'A cheeky red?'

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

Dog looks perplexed as man has his head out the window taking in the beer smells.

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'