Alcohol Recovery T-Shirts

'On the positive side, we were very impressed with the number of your personal weaknesses you were able to identify!'

'My name's Steve, and I'm an alcoholic. And I'm pretty sure the guy vomiting behind my chair is too.'

All Washed Up

'I really enjoyed my stay in the hospital - I never get served breakfast in bed at home.'

"Things are still a little rough for me, and occasionally I lose hope and get depressed—but I'm getting stronger every day."

Spa

"I'm afraid we'll have to operate. Your appendix has an infection and it's extremely aggressive."

"Actually, I'm still on life support. I just came by to do a feasibility study."

'And when did you have your last owl movement?'

Vlad the Inhaler

"Let's consider an early dive."

Cardiac Recovery.

Express Barber Chair for Chemo Patients

'Believe me, Mr, Hart, Laughter really is the best medicine,'

"May we live in interesting times. And may we outlive them."

Self-esteem room

'Okay, Mom. I'm sorry I re-gifted one of the kidneys you gave me.'

"He's going to be O.K., but he still wants you to remarry."

'When he said it would be 'me and him against the world' I had no idea everyone was already mad at him.'

'Your master isn't due for release until the first of the month.'

Clown Cheering Up Patient.

"He should be up and complaining in no time."

'Not feeling well? Don't be silly - your EKG has outperformed the Dow.'

As a rule, all surprise parties start out with good intentions.

'You seem rather ungrateful Mr. Jenkins. This new drug means you'll never have hayfever again.'

'I'd like a second opinion, doctor.'

"Good news! She's asking for her Banana Republic and Williams-Sonoma catalogues."

Saline Drip Sommelier.

'After giving a recorded statement to these people, being grilled by 60 Minutes would seem like a piece of cake.'

Healthy living has added years to Melvin's life.

"Yeah, my life flashed before my eyes!...OK, it was food - all the food I've ever eaten flashed before my eyes."

COVID 19

Mimi's final scene

"I can't stay in this hospital bed too long. Everyone will think I'm too old...too fragile...ready for the home. I'm not ready for that!"

Get Well Soon and Hurry Back to the Office. . . Before Sharks Eat Your Job