Airport Escapologists T-Shirts

"Sir, you've been downgraded to the baggage compartment."

"I've just about had it with these corporate retreats!"

'Miss Fenwick - I don't want to see anyone today!'

"Hell: The Airport"

"Will you be flying through to Toledo, or attempting to leave mid-air?"

"We've had to introduce measures lately to stop the entomology department from knocking off early on a Friday."

Man at Fire Escape sees door with 'Hot Button Issues Escape',

"I've never been this excited about an anal probe before!"

'You have the right to refuse the body scanner, but then I'll have to pat you down.'

'For the life of me I can't see how cooking over a fire, bathing under a spigot and sleeping on the ground can be fun!'

"I am afraid Mr. Jones is in his career coaching session. Can I get him to call you back?"

'Do you have a flight that will get us to Gate 2?'

"I've spent the last 6 months teaching myself escapology."

'I realize this has been your favorite camping spot since you were a kid...but it's just not the same with all the construction over the years.'

Security at the Smaller Airports

"It's my emotional support animal."

Houdini 2019

'If you lose my briefs you can answer to the Judge!'

Magician at Customs - 'Nothing up your sleeve hey...?'

"Can you just fetch our red ones, dear?"

"Hey, it's the scouting virus! It doesn't affect your pc, it just makes you want to go camping!"

"There's apparently another one of those rescue ships coming to take us back to civilisation. . . quick, let's hide!"

'Wait for me!'

Excess Baggage

'Jane It used to be jungle out there'

'Sir! Elsworth's away from his desk again!'

Tortured by music

'Those set it off everytime.'

"We don't consider you luggage 'lost', we like to think it's off on an adventure."

Customs at the L.A. Airport

Where lost luggage goes. . .

Phil would try anything to avoid paying hefty airport parking fees.

Submarine Disguise

'I always check 2 bags, but one's just a sacrifice to the luggage gods.'

Excess Baggage: Airlines continue to come up with new add-on charges.