Airline Ceo Pillows

"Today only, Mr. Hardly, when you buy one 737 MAX airliner at our special price, we'll throw in a second 737 MAX absolutely free."

Excess Baggage: Airline CEO's should be forced to work at the check in counter explaining those hated add-on fees to passengers.

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

Spot the difference.

(oil - petroleum - gushing out of inkwell)

Airline Debts: Layoffs to help us stay afloat.

'Do you have any specific regulations concerning travelling with pets?'

An old-time engineer enters the cockpit on a flight.

The new boss brought a sense of urgency.

Largest passenger aircraft ever built. "Why does it have to be so big?" "We had to make extra room for all the subsidy money."

'You can't put him out to pasture - he owns the pasture!'

"Sure, money may be imaginary - but at least it's got everybody imagining it."

"On this team we take off our jackets,but we don't loosen our ties."

'He's a good listener, but only to the sound of his own voice.'

'Our most successful e-mail campaign was an offer to take customers off our e-mail list.'

'Bring me some more power.'

"Its my letter of resignation. I also turned it into a memoir."

Excess Baggage: Airline CEO's should be forced to work at the check-in counter explaining those hated add-on fees to passengers.

"To join OPEC you must be a country and filthy rich in oil."

Executive with desk-boxes 'get rich' and 'get even'.

Ethanol and foreign oil.

"There's something about seeing red that just drives me crazy."

Airline Mergers.

'...I know just the man, I'll send him right over.'

'I'm happy to report our use of air sickness bags has declined sharply since we quit serving meals.'

Terrorism premium on every barrel of oil.

'Remember Jones, your organs are worth more to us than your intellectual property.'

Safest Airline in The World

"I thought I'd be lonely at the top."

"This is your captain speaking."

"Running out for lawyers and CEOs. Want anything?"

'Call me a cockeyed optimist but I still believe big executive bonuses and perks can buy happiness.'

Fired Big Shots Who's Who.

'Probably to put in his tank!'

'We harbour few illusions here at Megatron Inc.'