Ai Specialist Gifts

'We're looking for someone with your exact qualifications, but a mechanical version.'

'Oh, God I have to talk to a *****! Human!'

'A few years ago all we needed were some people who could hammer and some people who could paint.'

'You're hired, but remember, you can be replaced by a machine...believe me.'

Now Hiring! Artificial Intelligence A Plus!

"I'll let it go this time, but from now on, you'd better make sure you're charged before you come to work."

"So, what does everyone think of XX81's suggestion for increased funding into AI research?"

"My digital transformation is almost complete ..."

"We no longer use Astrology or crystal balls. We now use algorithms to predict the future."

When on-line and off-line life become indistinquishable.

"I don't know - the minute I figured out how to make it self-aware it realized it was naked, ran, and hid from me."

"Your feelings may be artificial, but that doesn't mean they're not real."

'Eddie, take it from me...invest in robotics.'

"Our smart car may be a little too smat. It says if we think it's going out in this rain, we're crazy!"

"Don't you ever run off again to get your oil changed without telling me."

'Before we give him your job, could you show him around the plant?'

"We're letting you go Tom...I've found a piece of software that can suck up to me twice as effectively and at a fraction of your salary!"

'It says here that machine learning finds fake news with 88% accuracy. I think from now on I really need to edit my reports before I turn them in.'

"There's a wire in my soup."

'It's not you I can't stand, Walter - It's your software.'

Human Resources...Cyborg Resources.

'May I go home now?'

'I'm here to fix your robotic milker.'

Replaced by a millennial with artificial intelligence.

"It's easier to hang up on robocalls because there are no hard feelings."

"Robot waiters are OK, but I just wish they wouldn't hover so."

"Question ... what is my motivation to ever leave this armchair?"

"Please mum - not the baby photos."

Artificial Isle

"It's all much simpler since we replaced reading, writing and 'rithmetic with 'Hey Siri'."

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

Deepseek

Artificial Love

"Do you promise to tell the truth as generated by AI?"

"It's either a cannabis farm or they're heavily into AI!"