Agri-humorist Pillows

Bar Code Harvester

Soaring gas prices for farmers.

"No, I like the plan. Just saying, have you ever done any actual tunnelling?"

'Henrietta is so self-confident.'

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

'We're taking over tonight, it's the only way to save the farm.'

A sure sign of rain

'Some dogs are meant to be working dogs and some aren't.'

"Static cling."

'Pass the salt, will ya, buddy?'

'Mother, there's something you're not telling me about that alien invasion, I can feel it!'

"Don't be so dramatic. You tell me you're pregnant every day?"

'That GMO gene salesman was darn right!'

'How are you at thinking outside the flocks?'

"That was definitely mine."

Emergency room doctor about half cow: 'Farming accident. Be sensitive - she's beside herself.'

"I guess it must be that new growth hormone the farmer gave me!"

'Tropical fruit, imported cheese, coconuts...I'm not really into that 'eat locally' stuff.'

"I was hoping Calvin would grow up to be top sirloin..."

'MEN! We've got a fire at the cattle shed! Do we want rare, medium or well done?'

'That hussy. She's always first in line for insemination.'

'I promise, you're not crossing to the Dark Side.'

A Tongue Stud.

'I finnaly located what was causing that hissing sound on the tractor.'

'With proper flossing there's no reason for hens to not have teeth.'

"Ok, let's try it one last time. It's 'Ahhhhhh'..."

'This is your third speeding ticket in a week. Sure your horse didn't get into some genetically modified hay?'

'Oh quit griping and be thankful we even got a bonus this year!'

They're Brazillian!

"I get aroused when I see you in leather."

Grassy breath?

Cow asks the horse for the carrot.

Experimental Free Range Guinea Pigs For Sale.

'She says her stomachs ache.'

"The body is eighty-two-per-cent broth."