Adventure Driver Gifts

'Spending the kids' inheritance doesn't go far enough - we want to bugger up the environment for them too.'

You're Lost.

'It happens every time I go over a bump.'

'For goodness sake dad, buy a sat nav.'

Solar car with automatic navigation system, automatically choosing sunny routes.

It's a Whole Field of Paisley!

'Wavering between being bullish or bearish'

'Next year I'm hiring a tank!'

"Your tires are spinning and you're stuck."

"I want to be straight with you, Cathy—I've gone through a number of cars in my life."

"If you think I ride too fast, Susan...just say so!"

'No, don't tell me, your electric garage door is broken.'

The next fast train has gone.

Caution, Student Self-Driver

Wherever You Go, There You Are - Next Exit.

Baby on Board, Mother on Edge.

'I think I've found what's causing the radio's funny buzzing sound.'

"To work again? This is getting boring, Lester."

Tourist sunbathing on Easter Island beach

Edna's Couch and Breakfast.

If a motorist came bursting through the doors...would he be up for damages?

Mr Tom Noddy's First Day With the Hounds Pt. 1

'Daddy-if we didn't have Mummy how would you know how to drive?'

'If all the red warning lights come on, it means meltdown, so get out of the car fast!'

'No, you don't get extra credit for a creative parking technique!'

Now Entering Wyoming (or one of those other rectangular states that are out west someplace).

Mexicans always drink their tequila with a lemon and a little salt!

No sooner had he taken the shot when the elephant suddenly charged him!

Alternative Airport

"Clippety clop, … clippety clop. …. clippety clop. … clippety clop..."

"Isn't 85 the new 55?"

'I thought you said the kids were in the back.'

"Even our GPS doesn't want to be out in this weather. It's begging us to go back home."

"I want to explore the brutal and true civilisation, to explore lands on troubled by tourist boards, and if you could sort five-star accommodation and decent Wi-Fi that would be perfect."

"I'm sorry, but nine Greek islands in seven days is just too much."