Adjusting To Retirement Pillows

"Since he retired, he fills his days complaining about 'woke' television."

"Good game."

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

"You're very interesting, for a civilian."

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

'You're my best man, Pomeroy, so I've decided to sell the damn company.'

"He's got no clue how easy he has it compared to his ancestors."

Lady of the Cake.

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

'You wanna play another round?' 'Sure....tender, another round!'

"Don't be embarrassed. Most heroic archetypes your age have lost the ability to swashbuckle."

'Not that net!'

Business books - Who's Who & Who's Downsized sections.

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

Seniors Snooker Tournament.

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

"You've been so good to us all these years. Is there anything we can do to repay you?"

"Hawaii, where are you folks going?"

"Yo, Eunice – don’t leave me hangin’."

Woman uses a remote control to turn on the sunset.

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

"I don't care if you are the Immediate Gratification Generation. Get out of my chair and back to the mailroom."

"The GPS works great, we have satellite TV installed, the Sirius stereo sounds fantastic and our every move is tracked by Qualcomm. But could you turn around? I left me iphone at the house. . ."

"Feel free to take notes."

"I've decided to step down as CEO so I can spend more time with my money."

Help! I'm ROFL and ICGU!

Allotment

'Life is great' down on the farm.

The Solitary 'Pleasure' Fisherman whose one desire is to get away from it all.

Old navy veteran 3rd base coach

"Your contents have shifted."

Do you mind if we stop calling this a "starter house" now?

'This is the only part of my old Army uniform that still fits.'

"Gimme a large cheeseburger, regular fries and a diet root beer!"