Achievement Admirers Gifts

"Great! We're still going up! Chop a hole in the ceiling!"

Go! Means NOW!

'You were right Doc: Jumping over the monn did boost my self esteem!'

Dedication to excellence....

Pipe Smoker of the Year Awards.

'I've had a few short stories published, but I'd really like to write 'the Great American How to Write a Novel.''

'I let my merit badges do the talking.'

High Five

"I worked my way up from a goddamn steamboat - I am the American Dream."

'Very impressive. Do you have any post-kindergarten education?'

"It took a lot of hard work to get here, but it was all worth it in the end."

'Your resume states that you've worked with 2 presidents, won the Nobel Prize and climbed Mt Everest. That's all fine and dandy, but how are you at telemarketing?'

"When I'm grown up I don't want to poop on small cars in little cow towns. I want to poop on the limousines of the rich and famous on the Champs Elysees."

Military General with numerals medals and uniform decorations with 'cont. on back' sign.

'Well, we made it.'

Employee of the Month - male.

Waldo P. Smith, M.D., PH.D, J.D., M.B.A., $$$

"He's too ambitious, going for a black belt."

'I see from your resume, that on your last job you were salesperson of the month. Says here that you were given a plague. Do you feel better now?'

"Most people think I'm rich beyond the dreams of avarice. But I dream big."

'We sell gifts for people to give to graduates they know.'

Champion.

"I'm very proud of the grade A's, son, but what about these grade B smalls?"

'For a brief time I held the world record for the youngest person on earth.'

Graduate.

'After the wizard gave me the brain,of course, I felt like I should use it.'

'I think we're on different career paths.'

The indigo children.

'Well kiddo, I'm proud to say that in all my years of service, I've never lost a sheep...'

'I've been a model, a film star, a soap star, a dress designer... next I'm going to write a children's book and after that...'

'Have you been in long?'

The Achiever: competing with the appearance of virtue

Maybe you guys are working at Wall Street. But it's me who's consecrating the new sausage machine in the slaughter house tomorrow!