Accident-prone Pals T-Shirts

"If you don't want stitches, that's fine. Suture self."

Beware of Falling Notice.

"You run into a window, too?"

"274 meters of bandage - It looks as though you're going to make the Guiness Book of Records, Mr Henderson!"

First aid departments

'This is your lucky day!'

'I know just how you feel.'

'Fred, didn't I tell you to wear a helmet?'

'Quick! Contact my doctor!'

'While I'm here, Doctor . . .'

"If it's any consolation, the video went viral."

Broken ankle.

"But is it Organic?"

'Oops! Maybe I should've put this sign out a little earlier.'

The Old Good Cop/Bad Cop Routine.

Water Ski Accident

"I mistakenly stood in the doorway when kids sunday school released."

Attack of footballs.

'He's so unlucky that he gets into accidents that started happening to someone else.'

Mulligan's first mulligan.

Medical insurance reminder

Murphy and his brother 'sod' at work on their now famous law.

'Sidney's such a klutz. He broke his leg in three places -- Boston, Akron and Salt Lake City.'

Life on Earth - dog bandage.

'Oh, no -- not again!'

"Sorry I didn't return your calls of earlier today."

"Oh, that's Mr Norris. He's our risk analyst."

Broken ankle? Blown out knee? Compound fracture? No problem! Get back on the court in a jiff with the amazing new Roller Brace!

Roller blader with bandaged head

'Gardening mishap-the window boxes fell on him!'

"Did you make all these 911 calls?"

"Wait a minute! This is the statue of a colonial army general and as politically correct BOC's we can't nest on something like that!"

'He does it every year - we call it his winter break.'

'You wrecked ANOTHER snowmobile?'