Accident Humorist T-Shirts

'Number of days since last accident' a man is falling off of ladder while trying to post numbers...

"Now it's broken."

Speed laws enforced by gawkers at accidents.

"Well done!"

Mobile library.

'How are we going to explain this to our insurance company?'

'-and the look on his face when you overtook him in the Car Wash!'

A Not So Grand Slam.

Cotton candy

"Gues who I ran into today?"

'Well, there's something you don't see every day'

"274 meters of bandage - It looks as though you're going to make the Guiness Book of Records, Mr Henderson!"

Footballer with a broken leg and a ball in his cast.

'...Plus $847.93 for replacing our front door....'

'This is your lucky day!'

Basketball injuries.

"I did warn you about doing that, Gorak. . ."

'Guns Galore Inc' 'Prolong your Life'

"Larry does all his own stunts."

Bathing and Showering.

"This next one's a sad little number I call, 'I left my guitar on the F train.'"

'How was my emergency stop?'

Drunks brought into A&E: Alcohol and Emergent Sick.

"I said, you have to be active in your own rescue!"

"He's brutal but considerate - that's his victims' support number, NHS direct."

Man who has crashed his safety bicycle

'I tried to slam a revolving door.'

'I swear this self driving car is falsifying it's records to avoid an insurance rate hike."

"And do you get a shooting pain between your eyes?"

Dual Airbags

"And hold the mayo."

'Do you remember what make of car it was, sir? -- We'll have to order parts.'

'He's so unlucky that he gets into accidents that started happening to someone else.'

'It doesn't work...'

"I did a risk assessment of the dangers of not doing a risk assessment, and decided it wasn't worth it."