Accelerator Aficionados T-Shirts

"Just for fun today we could fire some eggs around."

Agility God

Largest passenger aircraft ever built. "Why does it have to be so big?" "We had to make extra room for all the subsidy money."

Technique #54 airlines are adopting for handling excessive carry on luggage.

The Wright brothers discover the first nightmare flight

"WOW...this new bike has great acceleration!"

Gymnasts falling off the winners pedestal.

Why Superman flies himself

"Can't stop watching. That ribbon is amaaazing..."

'I'm happy to report our use of air sickness bags has declined sharply since we quit serving meals.'

'I wouldn't be so concerned if they weren't already sitting in the exit row.'

"Hi, I'm Jamie Theakston and this is Dogs Might Fly."

"This is it, everybody. Jack and Harriet Schroeder sing Harold Arlem."

Santa Elevator

Top Ten Elevator Hits of All Time

'C'Mon ladies, work that bovine!'

"Zero to 60 in 4 seconds. Think of it! You'll be the fastest guy to the next red light!"

The aviation experts come out to play

"I'd be fast, too, if I had legs that long."

Life in the Fast Lane.

'Don't tell me you weren't speeding back there. When you drove by me, all I could see was a blur.'

'In denial and loving it!'

Ventriloquist Speech Therapy.

Angel learning to fly...

Intramission

Bismark Ballet School

"It's my emotional support animal."

"Of all the times to stall."

"You people make me sick. Nonetheless, here's a little toe-tapper."

Doggy aerobics class - 'All right...we'll start with some tail-chasing...'

'55 minutes? Really? And you call yourself the fastest land mammal?'

I'm sorry, sir, but your luggage was deemed offensive and destroyed.

The one thing that drives elephants wild is sickeningly sweet elevator music.

"What's the rush? He'll still be dead when you get there."

'I want the jury to completly disregard counsel's back flip.'