Academic Parent T-Shirts

'Right that covers nutritional theory in the socio-economic context of class structure in a eurocentric and essentially homophobic culture, now if one of you could take a tit out we'll do a practical.'

"That's our house, that's Mommy going to work, and that's you, staring out the window, wondering where it all went wrong."

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

Yummy Mummies

'I really wanted to only take accounting courses, but my parents made me take this cartooning class so I would have something to fall back on.'

"I want to have at least two children - I have too much guilt to give for just one."

"We're going to have to think outside the box to boost sales, minion."

"It's a GPS for busy executive mom. It tells you if your coming or going and when you'll get there!"

'Child labor laws don't apply to homework, Jimmy.'

'Spelling, math, history, geography --now the stupid school wants me to take a polygraph test!'

'Here's another email from a parent, written in lower case with no punctuation and seventeen spelling errors, demanding we do a better job of teaching social skills.'

'We just figured that with the kids travelling so much for soccer, it made more sense to sell our house and get an RV.'

"Do you really use all of the stuff on this school supply list?"

'How did our summer vacation turn intoa summer job??'

Mrs. Tree? A hockey ball hit your daughter. It's likely just a bad bruise. Whew! Though there could be a fracture, nerve damage or fatal blood clots. What? Don't worry. Our medical advisor is evaluating Twig right now. Can you sign this liability waiver? Her hand seems fine. Team lawyer.

'When I want to watch a realistic comedy about a working mom, I'll look in the mirror.'

'Congratulations. It's a latch key kid.'

"Our training on managing a work life balance is running late so you'll need to get someone to pick your kids up."

"Lemme guess: You forgot the basil Mom asked for, and my ice cream is in your briefcase?"

Igloo Art.

"Quick mommy, call Sothebys."

'It wasn't my fault. They asked me about things that happened before I was born.'

With their only child off to college, the Gilmonts each suffered empty-nest syndrome in their own way.

"Tough time getting out of the house this morning?"

"Be there in a sec, darling. I just want to touch base with Tiffany."

'My kid is going to Harvard, and Jim's son to Stanford- which college accepted yoyr kid, Fred? ( pix of clown on desk)

"Go join your coach and the rest of your team. I'll be watching from the bar."

"Do I read better than Mommy?"

'Don't take it too hard, Dad, Mr. Hodes down the street is just having a great year.'

"What is the battle cry for homeschoolers?" Kids: "Go Home!"

'Alert the troops I'm going back to work.'

"Higher learning gets higher each year."

"Looks like Dad has finally given up on trying to beat us at chess."

Principal: 'Is THERE a DOCTORATE in the House?!'

'I didn't do my homework because I forgot my user name and password.'