Academic Discourse Enjoyer Gifts

'Our next guest is an economist who is the author of the first economic theory that proves that money makes the world go round.'

Scarcity

"O.K., O.K., people - we're not workshopping these, they're already set in stone."

The Government's Got Your Back. And Wants Your Front As Well.

"I disagree — I think humans are funny."

"It started with a simple case of peer-review."

Battle of the sexes in a relationship

"At least we agree to disagree."

"Discussion topic: Is our society becoming less civil and more violent?"

Max Weber

"Of course I'm responsible for that marketing plan, but you're responsible for how it turned out!"

"I've learned to give up when I hear Brooklyn in your voice."

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'After being here for more than forty years - as undergraduate, graduate student instructor, professor - what saddens me most is that this was not the college of my choice.'

Psychology Dept. Faculty Evaluations Today. I can't tell if it's my id or my ego, but I'm really craving a promotion.

"C'mon, Hillary – just answer the question!"

The Last Republican in America

"Millstone is not yet a full professor."

Atheist Convention: 'I don't believe it!'

Cambridge Dons Researching Gravity.

THE UNCANNY PREDICTIONS OF THE GREAT NOWSTRADAMUS, 'A prominent academic will suggest that females may be intrinsically emotionally different from males... and the feminists will become hysterical.

Since you conduct only thought-experiments, we were hoping you would, from time to time, come up with some thought-results.

'That's it?'

"In conclusion, I hope you all make plenty of money to donate to your alma mater."

Emile Durkheim

"These days, professor it's "T.V. punditry or perish.""

- Do you prefer the talking points, or the doing points?

"May I remind the faculty that, in the event of a nuclear strike, atom bombs take a gender-neutral pronoun."

'Very clever, Gödel — your theory has a built-in disclaimer!'

The unfortunate night there were two talking sticks at the conflict resolution meeting.

'Let's face it, marriage isn't just a word it's a sentence!'

I heard you've to an awful, mysterious pain in the side of your face. Yeah. You can try the modern approach, drug yourself silly so you don't feel the pain. You know a better way, Sadie? Well, in your case, I'd suggest going with the tried and true cure-all: Drill a hole in your head to let out the demons. No need. You're already out. That's ... Well-played, nemesis. Well-played.

"School is loverly this time of year."

"This is awful - the fear-rioting-violence-looting and police that over react."

A cow with Barbie's proportions.