Academic Critique Appreciator Pillows

'My tests are very difficult. Not one of them has ever made a refrigerator door.'

Filling the Missile Gap

Final words on gravestones.

Alms Bank

Master's Degrees of the Universe

The president of a company see a sign: While you were out we hit the lottery!

An acceptable level of TV violence.

The Real Russian history

"Well...I notice a little criticism on my leadership style..."

"They're going to print a retraction - your desserts are not inconsistent."

'If a job's worth doing, it's worth off-shooting.'

'I didn't choose art. Art chose me!'

Rubbish, Poppycock, Balderdash

Cartoon Editor: No, No, No, No, No, No, Maybe.

'Too many cliches? Now hold your horses!'

A man is looking at a sign saying Exhibition of art exhibition jargon.

The Man of Taste.

'Your trouble is that you don't appreciate good food.'

'That's because they won't let you die until you pay your student loans.'

"Do you mind if I give you feedback?"

"I just love your use of lying"

Editor

Art is a cruel mistress.

Ezra Pound

"How about we forget 'new and improved' and settle for 'new'?"

'After the wizard gave me the brain,of course, I felt like I should use it.'

"Is it a witty and insightful exploration of the zeitgeist of 'boundaries' or is it in fact, the way out?"

'I really don't see the point?'

"Your earlier work was better."

'Gee, I wish I'd said that.'

A truck full of radioactive waste with no particular place to go...

"When do you teach us how to become motivated?"

Intellectual support animal

'Since when did we start getting report cards, too?'

"This is an intervention. It's clear that you've resumed your habit of reading the reviews."