Absurd Travel Fanatic Gifts

Recalculating

Carefree luggage.

"If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room!"

"Yes, six to seven weeks is my life expectancy! Once I learned that, I thought, the hell with it, I'll stop working and start travelling..."

"No flight of the Bumblebee"

"Don't move! It's as I suspected, they're attracted to clowns!"

A private jet takes off

Camping holidays in the British summer.

"The candy on the pillow is a nicety of the house."

Can I have a look at the map?

Airport

Somewhere in France - The Eliot sisters come face to face with escargots.

Getting out of baggage fees is tricky, another sweater or two and I'd be charged for an extra seat.

'As a matter-of-fact I didn't pack my own bags...Well,well, well...Speak of the devil!'

Waiting for the snow to arrive in Aviemore.

Passengers arriving on luggage conveyor belt

"I'm going to Bognor next year!"

"All the other passengers have collected and gone so well just have to admit they're ours!"

"Well, that's just great! I guess pigs don't fly after all!"

Holiday Luggage

'Of course, here in Australia we have to learn to contend with vineyard pests that are unique to our locale.'

'You have the right to refuse the body scanner, but then I'll have to pat you down.'

Why used clothing should be declared a dangerous weapon...

Traffic Sign

The Reaper family on Holidays

Your Luggage

'You've been looking for that cuff-link, haven't you? Well...'

Maps to the house arrests of the stars

"Whether I have five passengers or five hundred, I try to make the same inane announcements."

"We are sorry for the delay in announcing the delay of flight 601"

"Funny hey, my mum's advice on 'travel essentials' is 'don't pack a toothbrush'..."

"How long would it take to cook my goose? I have a camel train to catch..."

The International Exchange Student Comes Home

'This will hurt you more than it will hurt me.'

Lost Luggage/Lost Passengers