Zoo Worker Gifts

"It's a sure sign they can breed in captivity. He's logged on at computer dating sites."

"Next show, stick to the routine, balance balls and jump out of the water: Why on earth did you try to tell jokes!"

Koala

Feeding of a giraffe with the use of a balloon.

ZOO

Domestic event in the Zoological Gardens No. II. - Delicate state of the hippopotamus

"When the researcher said we were going to a gated community, I had no idea what he meant."

'Hey, mac, is this your idea of glasnost?'

"Look, until there's a Tinder for pandas, we have to meet the old-fashioned way: being locked in a room together by scientists."

"Building a ninja-attracting business culture is easy. Keeping them focused on equity-based financial analysis? Not so easy."

Giraffe Haircut

'Stop crying! Daddy wears BROWN shoes!'

Giraffe and Gloves.

Bus for Giraffes.

Elephant Trunk and Hose Pipe.

'This is not what I expected when you said we were going to help an endangered species...'

Two cleaners at the zoo. They are sheltering under a giraffe to get out of the rain.

'You're kinky, aren't you, Samuel?'

'Will frolic in trees, or whatever it is we do, for food.'

'Hey, boys, I wouldn't tease the guerrillas - they will shoot.'

"Can i get a transfer from the porcupine enclosure..?

"There's talk of a merger with London Zoo."

'Now that's just low-down mean.'

'Don't' Feed the Animals' sign with a saw in it.

"After my arrest for trying to eat you, they put me in a captive breeding program."

"When do the kids go back to school?" "Oh, I don't know... 8 days, 16 hours and 47 minutes... or so."

'Nothing worse than a tickly throat!'

'Just jam one of these pills as far down his throat as you can, 3 times a day.'

'The keepers will be in soon - we better get back to the straw and bamboo.'

'Yeah, their website is called www.dazoosux.com.'

"Don't worry, I never get the jokes either, but if you clap your flippers, he'll throw you a fish..."

'Careful, he bites.'

"My promotion case went through: I'll get two fish per trick now..."

Zoo Corporation: Award for Solving a Big Pile of Poo Problems

'They worry about their cholesterol, but they don't give a damn about ours!'