Zoo Humorist T-Shirts

'I see London, I see France, I see your big distended scald-red ass.'

"Tough crowd... I suggest you try the hyena club."

City Zoo: Day Care

'Yes, I see your point...We may have to raise the rings...'

'Do they put up signs that say, 'Do not feed the moose.'?...'

'Ironically, it was when I was answering the Call of the Wild that I got captured...'

Dog Hunting Trophies.

'Dogs are so silly: Just throw a ball or a stick and they'll chase it and bring it back!'

"Yes, they're hair extensions, but you have to agree, I look fabulous..."

'So where do you think pineapple juice comes from?'

"You're very lucky that gazelle gives me diarrhea."

The Rooster Comedian.

"Happy Gnu Year!"

"Wow, these slippers are really warm!"

"Well, here's the problem. You been takin' the hair ball pills and givin' the Viagra to the cats."

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

"He's no hat and all corgis."

"Too much concealer?"

'...Excuse me...Whoops, my fault!..Sorry!..You first...Pardon Me...Sorry...S'cuse me...Look out!...Pardon'

"Yes, one is a dog."

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

'Of course I'm being catty. How else do you expect me to act?'

'Whup - giant anaconda about to attack - quick Peg, hand me something to take care of it with.'

"Just because we're hyenas doesn't mean we always have to get Laughing Cow cheese."

While old, sick, and weak animals remained targets, the lions most enjoyed culling the herd of its sarcastic teenagers.

"Eat me"

'Jurassic Pork.'

"I see by your resume this would be your first time in a symbiotic relationship."

"Scuba cow"

Hats and Food

"I'd kill for a fresh fruit fritter."

Burmese pythons discussing a complete invasion.

'I'd like to return this, please.'

"Yes, it's a safe: I was fed up with my winter provisions being raided by freeloaders!"

"Grass-cream! Thanks Mum!"