Zen Quipper Pillows

'That's your third bowl of gruel this week! What is this -- a feeding frenzy?'

"Behold the secret to happiness."

"Up here, light is neither a particle nor a wave. It's a liquid."

'The sound of one hand clapping.'

"I change my mantra every two months so no one can hack my soul."

"Showoff"

'Which would be more Zen ? a pizza with nothing, or a pizza with everything?'

How's my enlightenment? Call 1-800-Nirvana.

'Do you ever just feel like getting AWAY from it all?'

"Chop wood, carry water, walk dog."

When Buddha came to nirvana.

"She's been in shavasana for - like - a really long time...."

Physics Improv. "I now vill be taking suggestions from ze audience..."

Airport

''Faith can move mountains'? -- That's actually a little disturbing.'

Attack Of The Guy From The Other Room

Enlightened Cursing

Working from OM.

I am one with stupid.

"It's either enlightenment or excruciating boredom."

Binary Meditation.

"Mom?"

"Exactly what is this 'nothing' I've been hearing so much about?"

'At least with math and physics you sometimes find the answer.'

'Frankly I'm all meditated out.'

Zen Litter Box

"I used to be a young crazy rebel like you you know."

"Since both of us believe in reincarnation, what if I pay you all the money I owe you in the next life?"

"My mental ink pen ran dry.

Broad Minded

'At least with math and physics you sometimes find the answer.'