Young Swimmer Spirit T-Shirts

"I never thought turning eighty would be so much fun!"

'He's maturing early.'

"Peach fuzz. How does a nectarine know when it reaches puberty?"

"You used to be a lot more fun."

"Teenagers! Everyone try to look cool!"

"Went with the hair plugs I see."

..and with our new spirit website you can keep in touch with all your dead friends!

"I'm thinking about letting myself get old."

'I don't think re-living your childhood means you can go apple scrumping in next doors garden.'

"I cranked up the dose a tad. Why should kids have all the fun?"

"Miriam keeps me young."

"I may be an aged whiskey, but inside I still feel like a fresh ear of corn!"

"The next one is a hard-rockin', kick-ass, take-no-prisoners tune we wrote about turning sixty."

"He may be 90 but he's got the body of an 85 year old."

"Try to remember, you're not 70 any more."

"Spring Chicken"

“I’ve always wanted to learn to swim, but it’s never been more than thirty minutes since my last meal.”

"Ladies! Ladies! Do you wanna roll my Mercedes..."

'He did it for us.'

"I do feel like my old self, but I want to feel like my young self!"

"I need you to line up by attention span."

Dog Teenagers

Hit Me

'I understand there have been complaints that his sermons weren't getting through to the teenagers.'

The Ageing Process.

Too young to be a grandma

'I hate it when teen angst becomes mid-age angst.'

"I think I'll go home and start some unhealthy eating habits I'll live to regret."

You've got the body of a man less than half your age

"I can't figure out why the 'dog paddle' isn't working for you."