Young Digital Native Pillows

"He has the tweeting skills of a man twice his age."

"This isn't exactly what I had in mind when I told you to go outside and play."

"Let me just check my email, my texts, my missed calls, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp, my credit score, my horoscope, the results of this latest personality test, the S. & P., the Dow, the news, this article about cute dogs, and the weather, and then we can go."

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

This is a 'text book' it's a bit like a website but printed on paper.

"It seems as if the people taking my software class are getting younger and younger."

"No, I really thought each sentence ended with an emoji!"

"...and before you embark upon life's journey, could one of you help me with my laptop?"

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

"I can't find my other boot. I need to be rebooted."

'The definition of OBSOLETE: old fashioned dictionaries.'

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

Digital Fomo!

"And to my nephew, Todd, I leave my 27 Twitter followers."

"It's so cute when the boss brings his son to work and pretends to let him help out!"

'The school computers are six months old. How can I be expected to be competitive in the job market if I'm trained on obsolete equipment?'

"Lazy? I've been social-networking my ass off."

'Good night, Dear. Text me if you need anything.'

Trick or Tweet

"Sorry, but I don't know how to tie a Reef Knot. Give me a simple project, like building a computer."

A child sitting on a swing - while playing with a hand-held electronic device or phone

Baby Screen Time

'After we learn the alphabet, are we going to learn how to text?'

'New Game'

"My mom's restricting my phone. She says I don't have enough Selfie Control."

'Let us pray...'

'I'm afraid you've failed the Turing test.'

"Don't blame me for the grade, blame Google's algorithms."

"There's an app that helped me finish grades 3 through 7. If you need me, I'll be in my room playing video games for the next few years."