Writing Essays Mugs

"You did good on the true or false part of your application, but your essay was a little weak."

'Williams, we're not used to receiving such excellent ideas as these, so we'd like to tone them down a bit.'

"1984 by George Orwell. Project 2025. Presidential transition project."

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

"They say it takes 10,000 hours to perfect something- I guess I was a bit hasty throwing that together in 144."

The Art Student.

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

Copycats

I should be a writer when I grow up...

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

'How fast can you hype?'

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

Squeezing the Free Press.

It soon became apparent that the vicar was an undercover journalist.

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

"No, I didn't steal your content. I just have your content's doppleganger."

Campaign for Plain English

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

Library sections; Fiction, non-fiction and do-it-yourself.

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

For his next book, he would write an epic novel of the sea.

(oil - petroleum - gushing out of inkwell)

Meet Stephen Krkzk Author of 'Why Conspiracy Theories Are Nonsense'

"And isn't it time we replaced the worn-out, meaningless cliches in our mission statement with some dazzlingly new meaningless cliches?"

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"