Worried Well Pillows

Health MOT's will attract 'worried well'

"I stay awake all night worrying about my insomnia, doctor!"

". . . but he's almost four and he hasn't been labelled yet!"

"Why is it always me that has to get up just as I'm falling asleep to do things I forgot."

Nervous Oral Testing

I.T. Fear

Cheer up-things aren't so bad.....

"Returning to standard time is always difficult. I gain an hour of worrying."

"Things look good but let's run a few more tests since mortality runs in your family."

'I can't sleep for thinking about global warming.'

"I made a list of all my symptoms. Lost the list. Can't remember any of my symptoms now."

'Ten things you should be worried about.'

'Life isn't fair! Most of the stuff I worried about over the years never even happened!'

'...And my thirty-seventh symptom....'

"I forget. If I have an adverse reaction, do I call my doctor or my lawyer?"

Doctors often have to reassure the worried well.

'In the few remaining minutes of the lesson I can't do better than to show you how to fill an accident form.'

"It used to be that if you worried about unseen forces you were considered paranoid. Now you're a security expert."

"But why not be happy about all the diseases you don't have?"

Concern Chart

Expensive health care

"As a confirmed hypochondriac, I rely on placebos to get me through the day."

'I'm convinced I've got page 68 of my medical dictionary, doctor!'

No Action Comics

Health MOT's will attract 'worried well': I've looked up my symptoms on the internet and I think I've got ALL these life threatening illnesses.

The Circle.

'You worry too much. Next time something goes wrong, try blaming someone else.'

'Doc - this isn't going to cost me a lot - is it?'

'You're a hypochondriac.' 'Yes, Doctor, but am I a healthy hypochondriac, or a sick hypochondriac?'

'Panic over...it's not mumps just high blood pressure.'

'Have you seen the financial pages?' - 'Yes, things are going to get a lot worse before the get worse.'

I didn't experience any of the side effects listed in the enclosed literature. Should I be concerned?'

The End of Economic Stimulus is Near!

'Nothing to be alarmed about Mrs.Harvey, kids do this sort of things all the time. I'm sure whatever your Jimmy's gotten lodged up there, we can get it out.'