Workspace Warriors Pillows

"And yet, as we look at our lives, can't many of us say, 'My cubicle is too small?"

'I need a larger cubicle.'

"We went with an open floor plan because it can really facilitate a shared sense of hysteria."

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

'It's a chart of office morale. This is where you went on vacation.'

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

'Honey, I wish you wouldn't bring your work home with you!'

"You've proven your worth a hundred times over. Let's try for a thousand."

"Good" "Bad" "Work on it" "Keep working - maybe it's not as bad as you think it is" "Put it to a committee" "Give up" "Make it worse" "Make it better" "Still a bad idea" "Overthink it" "Throw yourself into a pit of wild badgers" "Throw it away" "Call it done" "Sigh."

"I've never said this to a woman before, but here goes: We're not paying you enough."

'Take two tablets the moment you begin to feel indispensable.'

37 years in the same position.

'Salaries Manager. No.'

"How's your insomnia?" "Bad, I can't even fall sleep during meetings."

Low-Energy Drinks

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

"Now, let's get out there and walk really fast to places we don't want to be."

Some days at work can be more challenging than others.

Hand Sanitizer Man, beloved superhero of every workplace in the world.

"The president demands that staff take responsibility for failures, and the multi-trillion deficit is down to YOU!"

'How many times have I told to seize the day before it seizes you?'

"Be careful what you wish for, Bob, because you just might get it. And if it happens to be what I was wishing for, things could get pretty ugly around here."

'I had no idea aspirin came in such a large bottle.'

'Can you do more work then is humanly possible?'

'Go right in -- he's expecting you.'

'I need to talk to you about the coffee fund.'

"Hiring someone to replace me and then expecting me to train him just doesn't sit well with me."

'Did you just show your teeth at me Wilson?'

"You are being overly-defensive again, Brenda!"

'Don't worry about the company's pension plan. The way we work you, you'll be lucky to live that long!'