Workplace Promotion Gifts

We like to show the endowment to newly tenured professors.

"Murray's the guy you replaced. He's decided to fight to get his job back."

'So, Bill! What do you think my chances are of moving into supervisory position?'

"You shouldn't do it because I'm telling you to do it. You should do it because I'm telling you I'll fire you if you don't do it."

"You're our most ineffective employee, we're moving you to where you can do the least damage."

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

'I hope you're not threatened by powerful women, because you're fired.'

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

Where your mind & battle are los

At the end of each day, Gary had approximately 7 minutes of free time – which left him feeling very vulnerable.

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

I'm looking for employees who have their own unique way of seeing things my way.

'Let's not go by the book.'

Butterfly Woman

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

'Finally! A meeting with one of the bigwigs.'

Killer Executive Suits.

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

In basket-case.

'It seems every time my business grows so does my paperwork!'

"Peter's Joint Head of Communications."

"Oh, yes, and there's plenty of opportunity for advancement."

Large Dollar Sign Office Block

So which rung are you on my corporate ladder?

Others will fight for you

"It's clear to me that you want to go far with this company."

A fight in the Boardroom.

'Manager. . . Commander. . . Chieftain. . . King!'

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

'You wanna play another round?' 'Sure....tender, another round!'

"Why can't the rest of you be more like Rollins, here? He does his homework!"

Businessman on stilts: 'I had to step over a lot of people to get where I am today.'