Workflow Wizard Pillows

'This software package can cut your workload in half. Do you want to purchase two copies?'

"This computer program is very intuitive. It automatically calls me when you do something stupid."

'It was accidentally reversed one day and our profits immediately skyrocketed.'

In Tray, Out Tray and Not My Job Tray

Input (not yours) and Output (only mine).

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

'I have created the first interactive pile of paperwork.'

Working from Home

"And this is the traditional alternative."

Failure/Due Diligence

"And last but not least, organizational psychologist Ron Haynes, who limits my switching of guitars to at least every other song."

'My target for this week is I go home early and try and memorise your names and faces.'

'This is Henry, he'll show you the ins and outs.'

'You like my in-tray full, don't you?'

Empty/Full

Why don't you do what I do, pass it on.

In many ways this is the perfect job! Out. Out.

Organization. What's this I hear about you feeling overworked lately?

I've always wanted to quit while I was ahead but the opportunity never presented itself.

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"

"We only got six days of funding."

"Good" "Bad" "Work on it" "Keep working - maybe it's not as bad as you think it is" "Put it to a committee" "Give up" "Make it worse" "Make it better" "Still a bad idea" "Overthink it" "Throw yourself into a pit of wild badgers" "Throw it away" "Call it done" "Sigh."

"Thank you for that summation of the charts."

Time Is Money

'You'll soon get the hang of it - then they'll change it.'

'And just what makes you think I don't know what I'm doing?!!'

"Remember Mr. Cockbundle is not just a 'customer', he is an important source of valuable and readily marketable data."

'Your resume is impressive, but next time try to shorten it from 100 pages to one.'

"Lovely dovetail."

"It's my intelligence, talent and hard work that have got me to the top."