Work Colleague T-Shirts

"Item 1 - party hats will be worn to all meetings to bring a sense of fun and frivolity to proceedings. Item 2 - you're all fired."

'Hide me.'

'I say Johnson, what are you doing with my wife?'

"He will be somewhat surprised when he meets the new gay guy from accounting!"

"C'mon, Carl... you're not fooling anybody with that rug."

"That's Paul, he's our head of partnerships..."

"It means, Thank Goodness I'm Boss."

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

'What do you want first - The bad news or the even badder news?'

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

James Bond in a Snow Globe

'Look, you can only do so much!'

International Women's Day

"How's everybody doing? I'm not boring you, am I?"

'Can't they just switch to smaller barrels?'

'For your information, I am engaging the energy of change and complexity to create the future I desire.'

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

'The history of Glue. It's impossible to put down.'

"Helen brings home our second, third and fourth incomes."

'The lads at the office still talk about the day you told the boss what to do with his job...'

"So, tell me a little bit more about this house training you mention on your CV."

'As you can see by the pie chart, most of our expenses go to well, pie.'

Colour Version: Living by the Clock

'Take two tablets the moment you begin to feel indispensable.'

Boss's Desk Says No!

Smart Ass - Wise Ass

"Meet The Author"

Doug had trouble getting home at a decent hour.

Sometimes he just stood back and admired the breathtaking scenery of his life.

"I've done this procedure so often I could do it in my sleep. But that's only happened twice – that I'll admit to."

'Mildred-thy milk runneth over!'