Woof-worthy Entertainer Pillows

'You're having antoher doggie treat party, right?'

Uncle demonstrating chemical experiments to children

"Extreme miming"

'I'm not a magician, but I do keep live doves in my pants.'

'Silly me, I brought the wrong book -- You two just swore an oath of celibacy.'

Drunken singers in a public house

“What if I tell you the card you are thinking of is … the Jack of Hearts ?”

"In closing, I'd just like to say you've been a great crowd, folks. Don't forget to tip your waitress, and I hope this final number breaks your heart the way show business broke mine."

Off Off Off Off Broadway

Man playing a harmonica on a exercise bike bores customers in a restaurant

"I wasn't ho-ho-ho'ing at you, I was ho-ho-ho'ing with you."

Candy Corn Dracula

Forcing the Rabbit to Eat the Magicians Hat.

Ed's super-romantic but he's always a police detective. He calls our love 'consensual identity theft.'

'Nice Touch!'

"Why can't you just read in bed?"

A cocktail in a tuba

"I don't get it. Who doesn't love a circus?"

"Would you like to see my one-woman show about the specials?"

"Thanks, you've been a great audience. I'm Jerry and I'm here all week."

Pollution Free Cocktail Cabinet

"No, actually the viola is played more like this."

"I don't think air guitar counts."

Flamo the Fire Eater offering light to female bar patron

'You need to slow down - use more color.'

Home Video

Ventriloquists dummy

Punch has a smoking break.

'When the alarm clock went off this morning, he said 'I'll drink to that.''

The Imperfect Hostess

"We outsourced our joyless TV dinners to a delightful couple from next door."

"I'll draw them out with the cheese platter, but it's up to you to entertain them."

'It's some carol mimers dear.'