Witty Bureaucrat T-Shirts

Do you have anyone whose bark is worse than their bite?

'Hello? Missing Persons?'

'I don't care if it's a little storage room for King Tut, you still need a building permit and contractor's license.'

"You're allowed to think outside the box, as long as you stay inside the margins."

Call Your Office

"'COST: shedloads, COMPLETION DATE: God knows.' Perhaps you'd care to flesh out some details for us."

Wolf Reintroduction.

"You're a bureaucrat, Ed. What do you mean you hate paperwork?"

Industrial Injuries Benefit.

"We appreciate your insights Norman but the firm has reached the stage where we need actual ideas."

God's Office.

Excessive Paperwork

'We're downsizing the Pentagon into a triangle.'

'I'm pleased to announce the newly-created 'Office of Homepage Security' - to protect against computer hackers.'

Department of Sanitation: In Bin and Out Bin.

I see from this you were very good at organising office parties.

'Miss Carruthers, check and see if we have an extradition treaty with Disneyland.'

Before we can rescue you...you need a safety check.

Congratulations on winning the Inland Revenue Fiction Award.

Insufficient Postage

'I'll need four character references.'

The new contract will give you much more power over your future...so here are some guidelines as to how you'll be allowed to use it!'

'I'm sorry, sir, this is the department of Immediate Dissatisfaction. Your appointment is with the Bureau of Eternal Frustration.'

A woman sits in an office of the Food and Drug Administration in - out boxes marked MMMM Good and Oh - Bad.

A dart board for the Federal Reserve's planning policy?

'You like it? I'm getting a government grant for Phase 2.'

"We have all kinds of Regulatory Guidelines floating around."

'We've been looking into absences at our meetings and it turns out that Nigel died in 2006 and Trevor never actually worked here!'

Man at desk in 'Space research'. His in and out boxes are labelled 'inner' and 'outer'.

"What a coincidence! I'm forwarding your request at this very moment!"

'When she grows up she wants to be a nurse and do filing.'

Man entering spaceship is asked for his passport

EXPLAIN WHY YOU HAVE NOT REGISTERED WITH THE LOCAL POETRY OFFICE.

'Hey! Who stole my stamp of grudging approval?'

'Teaching, reading, writing, and arithmetic sounds like a good idea. Let me run it by an educational focus group.'