Wine Aficionado Pillows

"They were, sitting around the dinner table, knocking off a bottle of Côtes-du-Rhône and blathering about the Middle East – you've never heard such shallow, simplistic reasoning in your life – and one of them turns to me and says, "And what do you think, Barney? What do you think we should do?' and all I could come up with was 'Woof'. I felt like such an ass."

"Bitsy and I decided controlling our portions was no way to live."

(I'm tasting berries with deep earth overtones and a definite hint of almond) (That would be the Cyanide.)

Italian Stereotype

'You drive a Japanese car, drink French wine, eat Chinese food, own an American computer, buy Canadian lumber and vacation in Mexico. How can you be AGAINST free trade?!'

"Not much - just flushing out my arteries."

"It's a full-bodied wine with hints of acrimony, partisanship, and moral outrage."

"What do you have in investment-grade reds?"

"I love Boxing Day"

"This brand has a clean balance sheet, a lively marketing plan with tasteful notes of originality, and a strong fiscal-year finish."

An Excellent Nose for Wine.

'I'm getting cinnamon, brandy nutmeg, a hint of alsation...'

'Water? Oh, that's good! Hah hah hah! How very droll! No, sorry old man, no water here... This is a CULTURAL oasis!'

"I'd like a Merlot, nothing pretentious,just something 'avec un petit de je ne sais quoi!'"

'Boozer's Week.'

"I detect a subtle bouquet of money."

"OMG! I've bought wine instead of milk...again!"

"Do you think there's ANY possibility that the 76 pints of lager,13 bottles of wine and 12 kilos of chocolate you've had MAY have contributed to you feeling 'a bit under the weather'?"

The Conveyance of a Corkscrew Hand

"I think we need to have a chat about your 'support team'..."

The morning after her girl's night out Maude was suffering headaches, fatigue and nausea.

Passover wine - 'I will buy a decent cabaret next year.'

'Honey, I think our 3-second rule should just apply to food.'

The wine-shop

'I know he'll solve it--he even understands German wine labels.'

"Barry made the wine. I made the cheese."

"Well I woke up this morning and I got myself a fifth of...no, that's not gonna work."

'There are only 4 tastes, but thousands of smells - believe me, you don't know what you're missing.'

Louis Pasteur Looks Back: "Of course I'm very pleased with pasteurized milk, but naming a wine or beer after me would have been a lot more charismatic."

'The drinks cabinet is empty!'

Red wine teeth

'S'more wine?'

"Perfect. Kate and Eli are suckers for bold graphics."

'I don't actually want to learn so much that I become a wine buff - just a wine snob!'

'Just think of me as a bottle of wine. The older, the better!'