Wildlife Joke Fan Gifts

"You got lucky with that field trip, Phil. But it'll never work a second time."

"No gnus is bad news."

"You're very lucky that gazelle gives me diarrhea."

"Yes, they're hair extensions, but you have to agree, I look fabulous..."

"I see by your resume this would be your first time in a symbiotic relationship."

'Whup - giant anaconda about to attack - quick Peg, hand me something to take care of it with.'

"Just because we're hyenas doesn't mean we always have to get Laughing Cow cheese."

While old, sick, and weak animals remained targets, the lions most enjoyed culling the herd of its sarcastic teenagers.

"Too much concealer?"

"I'd kill for a fresh fruit fritter."

Burmese pythons discussing a complete invasion.

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

"Oh no. Is that my ex?"

'Pray for me.'

Giraffe Portrait

'I wanted a change in decor.'

'You know, after a long hard winter, I just HATE eating out of cans.'

"You never laugh at my jokes... "

Crow and fox

Saving for Retirement.

"Don't worry, it's not rabies: It's normal for me to foam at the mouth..."

The different taste regions on a blue whale's tongue.

'I didn't have time to hunt'

'Bernie, you're not gonna have anything disgusting to hurl at zoo visitors if you forget this.'

I know you do your mating dance just to embarrass the kids.

The polar bear's vending machine.

"Fasten your seat belt."

The cat's pyjamas - cat camouflage.

"Do screen doors just keep insects out, or other things too?"

"Man, what I wouldn't do for one of those free-range meals right now."

A polar bear has slipped and is sprawled out on the ice next to a yellow caution sign that features a slipping figure.

"Why do humming birds hum? Because they don't know the lyrics."

"I hate hibernating! All our devices need updating. And now we need to go through a thousand phone and text messages."

'This will teach them to clean up after themselves after they camp in our woods!'

'I don't see how you can breathe through that thing - it's so small!'