Whimsical Parents T-Shirts

'As you can see, it's a boy and he seems to be doing just fine.'

Empty Nest.

'I foresee a few more months of creating havoc without consequences, and then, yes, I see the 'cute' factor will start to wear thin...'

'Are we there yet?'

Baby Hairstyles.

'Oh dear. He's got my eyes.'

The Wright brothers discover the first nightmare flight

Fat Kid 14- Gets re-animated

'Dad, are you sure this is building the right muscles for football?'

The inventor of the Slip 'n Slide becomes a father.

"My fella was chucked out of the water-birth for running around the pool and bombing."

'...and please God, protect the social security fund for another sixty years.'

'Monster mobiles.'

"Jim was a model Dad".

'It just says strange things happened after she ate the wafers. It doesn't mention their street value.'

"I'd better not eat any more broccoli. I'm saving room for spiritual food."

"It's only the wind."

'Sleep tight - don't let the bedbugs bite!'

"Have you seen what goes into that stuff?"

"Pianissimo! Pianissimo!"

Witch's child wants to ride mechanical broom.

"Yes, there will be questions but you're unquestionably the nation's most badass mom."

'What do you say we become vegetarians?'

'Tortoise stampede! But finish your picnic, folks - plenty of time.'

'Can you do the dishes, love. I'll do the school run.'

"When I said you could use other materials with the sand, I was thinking shells and driftwood."

'My husband wants to know if the sonogram can tell if the baby is a Red Sox or Yankees fan.'

Non-working dog, please help

Oh, Wow! With all this baby food flying around, I can't wait until he starts eating steak!!!

'I took her to register in kindergarten, and they wanted a damage deposit.'

A British policeman looking for a black cat who is in the hedge behind him.

'Can I keep him? He followed me home.'

The cost of bringing up children soars to more than £140,000.

'Don't worry he doesn't want any. he's allergic to everything except straw stuffing.'

"Who's my good widdoo headless dog?"