Wellness Wildcard Mugs

"Do you guys serve beer?"

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

"Okay, now breathe another sigh of relief."

Self help acupuncture

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

You only have time for one: Choose your fighter - Exercise, Wash Your Hair, Eat, Breathe

"I spend my day prepping for a good night"

'Well, well, well...'

Woman and pets with hair sticking straight up all enter Stress Management Clinic.

"Your contents have shifted."

Be Healthy

Doctor pulling golf caddy sees patient pulling oxygen caddy.

'I'm ninety-two! Tell me what I'm doing wrong... I dare you!"

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

"This prognosis is positive, you've got a cold nose."

'Eat less. Drink less. Be merry more.'

Express Barber Chair for Chemo Patients

'I'm going to refer you to a specialist in that yucky feeling.'

"Your bad cholesterol is trying to persuade your good cholesterol to switch sides."

"Try thinking about something else."

"Another one so relaxed, she couldn't walk out of here."

'I guess my brain just started to really care about itself.'

"(Huff) Here's (huff) your (huff) tea (huff... huff... huff... huff...)" "I will almost certainly regret asking you this, but what on earth are you doing, you cretin?" "All (huff) across America, (huff) office workers are ditching (huff) their desks and walking (huff) on treadmills while they work." "Can I get some water?" "Coming right up." "Good thing I wore my tripping shoes."

Man Eating Minimalist Meal

Self-esteem room

'They help with my nicotine patch addiction.'

Yoga Xmas Decorations

Critisize your weight.

Steamed Room: "Man, I feel so much lighter."

Unguided imagery

"Migration ruins my 10,000 steps."