Weight-watcher Humour Enthusiast Mugs

"The diet section is located next to the snack bar."

Dieting Motivation.

Woman weighing herself while holding balloons

'I don't want you to give up eating entirely -- just the food part.'

"Oh come on!... How can I only have lost two ounces?!"

"I'm having you fitted with a monitoring device that will help reduce blood glucose during meals by automatically signaling the brain to reduce food absorption. It's called a belt."

Dessert Storm Veteran

'Wait! Let me clip my nails first.'

'In local business news, declines led gainers at E-Z weight loss centres.'

Instagram!!!

How much did you lose on your 14 day diet?

'Of course on this new diet, I only count the calories of the food I eat whilst other people are in the room.'

'The best thing about Ann's Aerobics, is it's location.'

FOOD TENDED TO GO DIRECTLY TO EMILY'S EARS....

Woman weighs herself on scales, holding helium balloons.

'It took a lot of willpower but I finally gave up dieting.'

'I have to go on a diet. Evidently the best things in life aren't fat free!!'

"Still fat."

"How's the new diet working out?"

"Harold, I think your obsession about your weight is getting out of hand!"

"That's what happens when you combine lo carb with lo fat fat diets."

"I have put on a few pounds, but it's mostly water weight."

"Brace yourself!"

Chromatic Scale

"I'm really good at diets, this is my 50th!"

'Getting that extra weight off isn't hard. . . keeping it off is.'

"All diet books, 69 cents a pound."

'Don't you like to do anything illegal or immoral?'

Successful dieting is just a matter of finding the right diet.

'Cheer up, at least it makes you look taller.'

No thanks, Bill, I'm allergic to chocolate. It makes me break out in pounds.

'It's really not that effective, but it's easy to store.'

"The economy is sagging and so is Walter."

'...until the doctor put me on this bread and butter diet nothing worked for me.'

'Eating celery burns more calories than not eating it. Throwing the horrible stuff away burns even more.'