Weekend Strategist Pillows

Armchair quarterback/Armchair everything

Glastonbury. After.

I could have danced all night!

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

'T.M.I.F.'

Santa sits in front of computers with naughty data and nice data screens.

"I've just barbecued my head again."

"In the whole length and breadth of this world there is no more admirable a spot for a man and his dog to pass the time than the local Home Depot."

'And just what makes you think I don't know what I'm doing?!!'

Friday

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

'How do you like my fantasy weekend so far?'

"She wanted to go to the beach. I wanted to golf."

A DIY disaster.

"The only hobby we tolerate is working on weekends."

"Not much. Just enjoying my post-lunch bounce."

A man repeatedly pulls the start cord on his lawn mower until it falls apart.

Preparing for casual dress friday at the investment bank.

"Ok weekend! I hope you can make up for that awful week!"

'Wow, how did you catch something smaller than the bait you were using?'

After the gun ban, the guys still liked to go out and horse around on weekends.

'Thank God it's Friday', thought the watercooler.

'No, mom, Frank wasn't struggling through woods, sand and water in a triathlon. That's his golf game.'

I hate Mondays and now I'm developing an aversion to Tuesdays!

Circus Act

"Are you sure how to use a baitcaster?"

Getting through the week.

'Personally - I'm against a four-day school week - I'm for a three-day school week. . .'

Non-Jet Lag.

Learn to play the violin in one weekend - 'This isn't working! It's Saturday evening already and I've only got as far as holding it properly...'

"Monday is too far from Friday. Yet Friday is too close to Monday."

Your five o'clock shadow is showing, Mike.

"Consensus on a Friday afternoon... what a lovely way to begin the weekend!"

'What did I SAY to DAVE?' - A person with hangover worrying about the night before.

"And this right here was our weekend in the Hamptons."