Weather Watcher Gifts

"What's that Scottish word for when its cold, dark and raining?"

"I would have gone on a run."

"Well, now the flood warning's been downgraded to just a light mid-afternoon sprinkle."

"Uh-oh, I think a storm has turned our valuable ocean-front property into worthless ocean-floor property."

"Cheater."

"Now, if New York were sunny and bright like Colorado, then that would be another story."

Rain, Sunshine and the Tree

A truck salts the road.

'Hello, I'd like to apply for some property insurance.'

"What is the normal temperature for this time of the year?"

The Last Throes of Summer and Real Life.

"Bernard, nobody likes and 'I told you so.'"

spring must be on its way - the rain's getting warmer.

'Wimbledon - The British weather is causing ever more contentious line-calls.'

"The National Weather Service is warning these areas to brace for what could be a crippling amount of Instagrammed snow photos."

'Welcome to Florida. Do you know your evacuation route?'

Today's Weather.

'Apparently summer's going to start next month...'

'Newsflash: Experts are warning that overloading the Cloud with billions of bytes could cause massive rain and flooding.'

Rain on solar farm: 'This weather is good for farmers, I bet?'

Weatherman: "Tonight's weather forecast is confusing, followed tomorrow by downright bewildering."

"I'd like to report a cloud."

'... And looking at the extended forecast. We see the swarms of locusts moving out by the weekend just in time for another wave of burning hail.'

American Heatwave: 'Hard-boiled again, Martha?'

'I've put on a lot of weight, but I'll lose it all in the Spring.'

Dave, determined to go green by using only solar powered tools, will hereafter check weather reports before making bids.

"Yeah, yeah, maybe it's cyclical but I don't feel any better."

Jesus snowblows a cloud.

'I don't think Jones is telling us everything.'

70 degrees in Spring / 70 degrees in Fall

'See, here's where you screwed up.'

"He never, ever prayed. Except for rain."

"See if you can hit Florida."

'Three little kids and their first words. Can you find out which one is the British kid?'

With our new superfast computers we can get the forecast wrong TWICE as fast as we used to...MET OFFICE