Watery Wit-seekers Mugs

"Be honest – is my pouch starting to sag?"

Czarcasm

"This might surprise you, but not everyone finds the smell of a rain-soaked world invigorating."

"I have to rest. The 'check engine' light on my activity tracker just came on."

'Throw me back and I'll tell you where a 12-pounder is hiding.'

Generic Store: Sign in Window

'I don't like to brag, but I'm the guy who coined the phrase, 'Honey, I'm Home'.'

Graph to find your IQ

Punch Drunk

Airport

Your resume is only 8 words long! You're hired!

In 1682 in a remote cave in the Ural Mountains, Heinrick Glaston discovers irony.

Thanks for the worm, but I almost got this stupid hook stuck in my mouth.'

"By the time we can marry in all fifty states, we'll probably be divorced."

"You think you're pretty holy, huh!"

Broad Minded

Witty Remarks You Can Never Remember To Say During The Meeting.

Boarding House

'And you dolls are the only friends I need to keep me... hey, where are you going?'

"Does my brain look big in this?"

Odd Angles, a monthly strip on coarse angling

Law office sign: "Defending the citizen's entitlement to folly since 1935"

"I. . . hate . . . bath day."

"Have you tried jet skiing? - I've never seen an unhappy jet skier."

Square Yard

Bored Room

"It's nice to know I've still got it."

"Ooooohhh, now that's what I call a piercing."

How Human Nature Works: 'Ok...Now I'm worried.'

'Would you like you water from the Indian or the Chinese side of the Himalayas?'

Fair Cop

Performer says line "Brevity is the soul of wit."

'I like my women like I like my light bulbs; dim, cheap & easily replaced.'