Wartime Satire Enthusiast Pillows

Hague Convention Defied - Use of Laughing Gas.

"1984 by George Orwell. Project 2025. Presidential transition project."

Enhanced Pedophilia Interrogation Techniques

Sen. Krupt. I don't tell constituents that we're fueling inflation. I say we're protecting consumers and thanks to us they won't have to worry about buying any cheap stuff.

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

Hollywood Sign Developers

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"And when the canyon fills up, that's it; herd immunity."

Support the Ex-Troops

"Now, how can I be of assistance?"

Torturing the English Language

Come in, minion. What's up, boss? I'm writing a novel. It's a thriller about an intrepid caf

Pretty Flowers

Life is for the birds.

We Tenatively Oppose War on Strictly Procedural Grounds

'I've decided to step down as your CEO in order to spend more time in jail...'

"Would you say that the sales projections in your 3 year plan are realistic?"

The height of fashion in 1796

"We're looking for that perfect blend of vision, ambition and ethical ambiguity."

reincarnated worm...

"If we only used bigger clubs we would defeat our enemies every time, and we would dominate them forever!"

Needed Inventions: An Airbag To Protect The Viewer Against A Really Lousy Program.

"I don't like the looks of that!"

"We don't care about his nose. We won't let him play because he's not vaccinated and won't wear a mask!"

"Let's say you've always wanted to make someone a mixtape to show them how much you care about them. What's the best order? Do you start with songs about how rich you are before moving on to the songs about love? Or vice versa?. . .What order would best simulate sincerity?"

"Really? They're now giving out non-participation trophies?"

"Just give me your wallet. Trust me, you do not want to deal with my misplaced sense of entitlement."

'Negotiations have reached an impasse, legal recommends we resort to violence.'

"We're suing you under equal opportunities legislation for failure to represent our rights"

"The document states that you've been left your mother's jowls and upper arm flab."

'The world already ended, but the government hushed it up.'

Cord cutter

I've Always Wanted to Be Oppressed By Someone Who Looks Like Me

"Mom, does the Russian borscht you made for dinner give me foreign-policy experience?"

Our Two Parties, Explained