Volunteer Skeptic T-Shirts

"That's how the congregation looks when I ask for volunteers."

'The wheel was easy, the owner's manual is hard!'

Introducing... The Everything Else Morning-After Pill!

'Don't believe everything you read in the papers!' (Vicar to lady reading the war cry).

Sunday 10 and 2: The Usual Superstitions.

New from Low-Key Press.

Telling Self to Buzz Off

"No religious nuts!"

Vote Grinkley! Now you see him, now you don't.

"Too much caution can take all the fun out of life." "Mind if I get a second opinion?"

During the Holiday season, Mr. Arthur Jeffries takes a little time to think of those who are less fortunate.

Atheist Convention: 'I don't believe it!'

Egomaniacs Anonymous - "There's nothing anonymous about me!"

Older cousin press

'Self service.' 'How much do I tip myself?'

'Self-help books for cynics'

'So help me, which god?'

'I haven't been trying for years and look where it's gotten me.'

Rational explanations

"Do not bury yourself alive if allergic to burying yourself alive."

Shut Yer Yapper and be Happy, Loser! There's a ton of so-called simple self-help books. The five most important questions: 7 habits of highly effective people: 7 steps to living at your fullest potential. Too many steps! She's going to be filthy rich.

Boss: 'Speak up Smythe, I know you've got an opinion, I told you what it was in my email this morning!'

The first meeting.

"We also stock non-alcoholic wine" "Why?"

"Please cut and paste these prayers to an other gods up there....just in case I've been following the wrong one."

"Oh yes, I've got the whole business computerised now"

'Oh my god!'

'I did it the hard way. No self-improvement books.'

'Thank goodness, the publishers rejected my self help book.'

Success Without Effort

"Yes, I've read the bible. I've also read 'Harry Potter', but I don't believe in wizards."

"I'm thinking of skipping the holidays this year, in protest." "Very good, little buddy." "I see you've read chapter 7 of 'Randy "the Rock" Taylor's Guide to Winning Respect'." "Become an admirable person by sacrificing something meaningful to you, in order to help others achieve something meaningful to them." "I'm very proud of you, young grasshopper." "I'm protesting the fact that I can't shop at H&M on Thanksgiving 'cause they'll be closed."

'Bucky's new book, I think.'

'What shall I do with these old books of yours? '

"How to spot a rip-off" Save thousands! Only £120