Voice Acting Pillows

'How are the ventriloquist lessons going?'

'I'm a voice over artist.'

"I don't like the tone of your voice. Mind if I tweak it a bit?"

"I'm sorry, we're looking for the voice of a spunky animated turnip and your reading is more fruit than vegetable if you understand what I mean."

"Cholesterol medicine commercial, Take 3. This time, try to sound less horrified when you say, 'May cause heart to explode through ears'."

'It's an animated movie, you don't have to do method.'

"You'll agree then, Doug, the numbers don't sound quite so dismal when I use my Donald Duck voice."

"Bill did the voice-over for this commercial."

'She dumped me for a guy who can talk like Donald Duck!'

"Are you sure I didn't dub you last year!"

"I hope they read the fine print that the audiobook is to be voiced by Morgan Freeman."

"There it is again: some kind of weird disembodied voice describing our every move."

"Besides digital assistant, what other voice work have you done?"

Welcome to California. You may begin your Schwarzenegger imitation now

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

They hated me.

"Just be yourself."

Benedict Cumberbatch

'Believing any filming experience may help launch acting careers, some even stage their appearances before closed circuit cameras.'

'They all want to play the star.'

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

"Samson was the best actor in the bible - he brought the house down!"

'Hamlet'

"Just let her believe in fairies a little while longer."

"Welcome to Off-Off-Off Broadway."

"They've remained remarkably faithful to the text."

Comedy Cafe

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

Theatre Masks and Butts

"An actor, you say? Guess you caught the acting-like-a-waiter bug."

'I guess it's not much consolation but I thought your impersonation of the King was a riot.'

"Have you read any of Shakespeare's plays?"

Joan Hickson

'Look behind you. . . Just kidding.'