Vodka Trickster Pillows

"You know, I really am a lot more relaxed since switching to decaf with a shot of vodka."

'Is the glass half full, Wally, or half empty?' - 'Oh, oh! Trick question!'

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

'Your shoe's untied.'

'Alright, which one of you wise guys pulled the fire alarm?'

Harry Potter learns some 'new tricks' on his first day enrolled in a public school.

Victoria's pre-marriage questionnaire continues...'Can I get input from the guys at the bar on this one?'

Primitive magician

Candid Camera store.

Some card-game puns

Little girl hoses down walkway as Santa slips and falls

'Of course he can do tricks...it's just he's got a bad memory.'

Yoyo sheep

"I'm giving you a 300% salary increase, and four months paid leave."

"For my next trick, I'll need a volunteer, a fake knife, and a mirrored box with a secret compartment."

Magic Tricks

'Tell your mom you coughed it up and you're guaranteed a day off from school.'

Wet Cement. Always the joker, aren't you, Ernie?

Spiro & Pusho illusionists

Magic Tricks

A dog has inflated the family cats with helium and they are floating on the roof.

"Mom, that magic kit you got me for my birthday, we may have a problem."

Unrest Area.

"So, then, I guess the Johnsons are feeding our clothes."

He'd attended Julliard and done Shakespeare in the park, and he never thought he'd sink this low, but there were bills to pay, and there weren't that many jobs out there for a bottle of seltzer water.'

"Police, this is the wife of Magi the magician, something's happened to him!"

"It worked as you said Mum! I yelled 'LICE' as soon as the lion approached and he stopped in his tracks to scratch his mane while I escaped!"

"If you dress in a costume that they can't figure out, they feel guilty and give you more candy."

Dog bringing paper and paper boy.

"Honey, the dog learned a new trick. And now I owe him twelve dollars."

'But, I have only one item of hand-luggage... You can't charge me extra...'

While at the Zoo, Victoria gets an idea.

'As you can see, nothing up my sleeves...'

"There's nothing magical about if, actually I just have a knack for this sort of thing."

'Guess what I'd like to see disappear next.'