Vocabulary Vicar T-Shirts

"Audacity, noun. Unrestrained impudence. Impudence... Impudence... Impudence, adjective. Marked by impertinent disrespect. Impertinent... Impertinent..."

It soon became apparent that the vicar was an undercover journalist.

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

'Mildred-thy milk runneth over!'

"We stumbled onto a house - and both of us being young and in love and quick to grasp the situation - "

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

Academic Idol - 'Professor Johannsen's paper was zippy. It had robust vocabulary and I almost felt that I could dance to it. I would give it a 7.'

Priest's 'To do' list.

"Black or white, Vicar?"

'Do you promise to love, honor and remain co-dependent until death do you part?'

'Today's sermon is on Eve and Adam....'

Kid to pastor: 'Which office is heaven?'

'Due to the poor response to the roof repair fund we cannot afford to lift the rafters when rejoicing in song.'

Freind: 'Misspelled, anything helps.'

Night-time halo

'Who's this 'Art in Heaven' guy you keep talking about?'

"Actually, I'm really looking for blessings that aren't in disguise"

Early Piety

What does aloof mean?

"It's a play on words."

"Today, I'll be cherry-picking from Deuteronomy."

"Sorry I'm late. I overslept." "Is that even a real word?"

"You seem troubled, Pastor. Is anything worrying you...I mean aside from the sins of the world, the vanity of humankind, man's inhumanity to man..."

Ninedency: A budding tendency

'First the dinosaurs, now this...'

"I hope you won't repent afterwards, Vicar, It's a devilishly hot vindaloo!"

'Wait a minute - How do we break a tie?'

Thou Shalt Not!

Teaching a Sunday school class didn't end the way John imagined.

'You were great at 'Daniel in the Lion's Den!' -- I'd sure like to hear you do 'The Three Little Pigs' sometime!'

'I've got two tickets to Handel's Messiah -- What time do you get off work?'

'No, but thanks for asking,'

Two Men Discuss Ministers.